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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. It can lead to lowered self-esteem, interpersonal difficulties, anxiety, and depression, and can erode group . In fact, it can be very damaging over time, to both the union and to the mental health of the individual being teased. Culture and teasing: The relational benefits of reduced desire for positive self-differentiation. Teasing and bullying are different. Be aware that if your child or someone you know is feeling distress due to being bullied, then it is important to take care of the issue as soon as possible. Turman, P. D. (2003). These types of activities are confusing for friends and coworkers. Needless to say, they all did their practice until the skill was mastered. Teasers may laugh and may mean little by their teasing, but the teased may not see it the same way. being made afraid of being hurt. Pro-social teasing is good; antisocial teasing is bad. 2023 Dotdash Media, Inc. All rights reserved. However, some people arent as good at recognizing sarcasm as others, especially if they are younger. Source: Google photos Depends on the scenario and type of person, teasing can be funny or hurtful. If teasing is having a negative impact on you and your relationship, there are steps you can take to help make it stop. Thank you, {{form.email}}, for signing up. For example, a child could say, "I feel upset when you make fun of my glasses. Explain why a childs teasing is inappropriate when it happens. . Expert Interview. 6 Reasons to Consider Child Care Management Software for Your Business, Webinar: Marketing Tips to Grow Your Child Care Center, How to Celebrate Valentines Day at Your Child Care Center, What to Include in Your Child Care Center Newsletter. Instead, the good intentions of teasers are not obvious and the person being teased often feels like the comments are mean and annoying. According to stopbullying.gov, The verbal bullying definition is the act of saying or writing mean or hurtful things. If used correctly, sarcasm can be funny. Hurtful teasing may have started as affectionate teasing. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. Sarcasm: "The use of irony to mock or convey contempt.". Have a friendly expression on your face. feels hurt. The Lawyers' Committee for Civil Rights Under Law launched the Stop Hate Project to strengthen the capacity of community leaders, law enforcement, and organizations around the country to combat hate by connecting these groups with established legal and social services resources and creating new resources in response to identified needs. Its light-hearted, natural and fun. You could call it a jocular insult offered with love or a lesson with a dose of laughter. Help students understand how hurtful teasing can be. Its just difficult. Support wikiHow by Bullying includes actions such as, but not limited to, making . Mean teasing {on-purpose, hurtful teasing unwanted by the other person} can cause real challenges in the classroom, on the playground, on sports teams, and beyond. The good, the bad, and the borderline: Separating teasing from bullying. With teasing, a person will often stop if asked. It's important that young people know that teasing can be harmful under the following conditions: When one person is targeted The one-liner he taught them is, Thanks for sharing that with me. Mr. Mendez had the kids practice this, making sure that they kept the cool look on while they said the words. If you tell them to stop, they should stop. Okay, so that part is debatable, but as we use it here, teasing is not intended to harm and is intended playfully. Verywell Mind's content is for informational and educational purposes only. "I have to yell, because you're so unreasonable and . Its your choice, but tattling to me is no longer a choice.. wikiHow is where trusted research and expert knowledge come together. Too many times when people tell someone to stop teasing them, they do not communicate in a strong way and the message gets confused. The person teasing shouldn't be trying to be controversial or mean to the person and everything should be in good fun. . 15 Apology Letters To Friends For Various Reasons. Hold a class meeting. Just remember to be friendly and self-confident when reminding them. Teasing can be a term of endearment or a form a bullying. With the skill learned, practiced and mastered, Mr. Mendez could implement his part of the operation. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. When teasing is unwelcome, it may be regarded as harassment or mobbing, especially in the workplace and school, or as a form of bullying or emotional abuse. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. Girls should strive to hold their head high. At times, teasing can be therapeutic, allowing us to embrace our imperfections and simply get a kick out of being human. New York: W.W. Norton & Company; 2009. As you might expect, this type of teasing is one of the most common forms of bullying. However, since teasing is ambiguous, the desired effect can backfire. Proyer, RT. She served as a middle school mathematics, science, and social studies teacher for three years prior to becoming a counselor. Stop hurtful teasing and bullying based on gender put-downs. You tease proof. Opportunities for Differentiation Younger students or students that need extra assistance, can work through the examples in part 2 in a small group setting with teacher guidance. This article has been viewed 25,243 times. And do not allow them to blow you off. If teasing is a regular occurrence among friends and you are always the target, it may be time to start hanging out with new people. Acknowledge what a common experience hurt feelings are. However, the last month or so it has become almost unbearable. The person doing the teasing has more power among your peers, or doesn't like . Use surveys and questionnaires to build a better workplace and detect potential issues before it's too late. PostedNovember 25, 2013 Please stop.. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. Dear (friend's name), I am writing this letter of apology to clear the air between us. Verbal bullying is when someone uses words to hurt or scare another person. What Should My Child Care Center Share on Social Media? Be sure you are assertive when you tell the teasers to leave you alone or to drop it. While you do not have to elaborate on all the ways the teasing hurts your feelings, you do need to make sure they know that it bugs you, it is not funny and you want it to stop. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. The goal of verbal bullying is to degrade and demean the victim in order to make the aggressor appear . How to Deal With Teasing and Subtle Forms of Bullying. Make Sure To Give It Back To Your Partner. By Sherri Gordon If she told you she tried to throw a basketball into a hoop and yeeted the ball against someone's head, call her Michael. The teasing involves name-calling, spreading gossip, intimidation or using slurs. Taking offense: Effects of personality and teasing history on behavioral and emotional reactions to teasing. But then she looked the six-foot-five, potbellied Englishman in the eye and, without really thinking . This is not playful and is done to show a power or status difference. It is a goal worthy of all our efforts to learn to achieve. Name calling and cruel teasing are common ways for children to exert power over each other. You can find out more about our use, change your default settings, and withdraw your consent at any time with effect for the future by visiting Cookies Settings, which can also be found in the footer of the site. Bullying is a problem that plagues every socio-economic group, boys and girls, men and women, employees, students, and others. Cutting remarks can wound deeply. Some psychologists believe that teasing is an important tool in building healthy relationships. Cyberbullying is the use of digital-communication tools to make another person feel angry, sad, or scared. Purpose: To define different types of teasing for students. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. Related: How to practise the qualities of a good teacher. But first of all, we all have to practice the cool look.. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. Office on Women's Health. On the positive side, teasing can be a way of showing love and affection. Allowing someone to become part of a group, like a clique, so that the group has someone to laugh at and make fun of. In contrast, hurtful teasing includes ridicule, name-calling, put-downs, and saying or doing annoying things. Professional School Counselor. You Can Judge Between Harmless or Harmful Teasing by Looking at Its Impact If good-natured teasing makes people take themselves less seriously and enjoy a healthy laugh, it can actually be beneficial to a relationship. Reinforcing behavior is easier when it is done consistently by all who model and influence behavior for children. Bullying, no matter how insignificant it might seem, can have lasting consequences for mental health. What Is Bullying. Man, I blew his mind!, All the kids clapped for this skillful second-grader, and the teacher beamed with pride as he thought to himself, Now that kid is really tease proofed for sure.. Examples of what I mean by hurtful teasing and sarcasm: 1. I'd say that for the most part, I enjoyed it. Once your son decides to respond, have him look the teaser in the eye, and using a firm, confident voice, give his friend the practiced response. I like to use the sloth acronym when teaching these teasing rules to students. She's also a psychotherapist, international bestselling author and host of the The Verywell Mind Podcast. Adults and young people will sometimes engage in playful teasing, but teasing can easily cross the line and become hurtful. This isnt negative behavior if everyone involved in the teasing gets positivity from it. Just great! Cyberbullying is done intentionally and repeatedly. If wikiHow has helped you, please consider a small contribution to support us in helping more readers like you. They want you to believe that you bring verbal abuse on yourself. Relationship Emotions: How to Express Feelings in a Relationship, Effects of Conflict and Stress on Relationships, Here's Why Arguing Over Text (aka 'Fexting') Hurts Your Relationship, Saving Your Relationship When Your Marriage Hurts, Daily Tips for a Healthy Mind to Your Inbox, To love and play: Testing the association of adult playfulness with the relationship personality and relationship satisfaction, The good, the bad, and the borderline: Separating teasing from bullying, To liven up a dull conversation or to try and come across as clever and funny, To keep the focus on others and not on themselves, To say something negative they've been wanting to say, To disguise abusive comments as teasing or joking. For some, teasing is a habit and a way of interacting with people. Bullying is the use of force, coercion, hurtful teasing or threats, to abuse, aggressively dominate, or intimidate. Amy Luckner is an assistant professor of psychology at Northern Illinois University. Although we sometimes think of teasing as the slightly less evil twin of bullying, there are actually both good and bad types of teasing (Barnett, Burns, Sanborn, Bartel, & Wilds, 2004; Mills & Carwile, 2009). (Mostly because sloths are fun and I am obsessed with them.). "You like Dr. Choose a time when you can both calmly discuss the problem. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. Knowing what you value will help you build the most meaningful life possible. She holds a Master of Education (M.Ed.) He said to the class, Kids, the reason kids tease other kids is that it makes them feel superior. Carly Snyder, MD is a reproductive and perinatal psychiatrist who combines traditional psychiatry with integrative medicine-based treatments. It can lead to lowered self-esteem, interpersonal difficulties, anxiety, and depression, and can erode group cohesion in a work or team environment (Barnett et al., 2004; Keltner et al., 2001; Mills & Carwile, 2009; Turman, 2003). When this happens, it can be tempting to blame the target and say that they need to learn to take a joke, or shouldnt be so sensitive. But a better way to address hurt feelings is to take responsibility and apologize. Save time with Jackrabbit Cares free templates. Teasing that has a negative result if it makes someone feel badly about themselves or uncomfortable is inappropriate teasing. Angela Grippo, Ph.D., is an Associate Professor of Psychology at Northern Illinois University. Purpose. In addition, the culture of the peer group also influences how teasing is viewed. Get the help you need from a therapist near youa FREE service from Psychology Today. Verbal bullying examples include: Teasing. Once children realize they can actually handle it, there will be a change in their attitude. Power is not a part of the definition. 1. In your small group, discuss whether or not you think each situation is an example of friendly teasing or hurtful bullying and vote in the poll below each scenario. This story will help you support a child who is {mean} teasing others by teaching them the difference between mean teasing and friendly teasing {joking that both parties enjoy}. I like to use the sloth acronym when teaching these teasing rules to students. Consider your relationship with the person you are teasing and your true intentions. I laminate the game board and use real dice instead of the printable die that comes with this game, but its up to you how you prefer to use it. Teasing may be a power play or a way of asserting dominance in a relationship. 1. In fact, Julie Cook, author ofTease Monster(and 50 other childrens book about social and behavioral issues) says that teasing helps satisfy the natural human need to fit in. 3. Empowering Students to Take Control of Their World. They even spent some of their recess time practicing this on the playground. The child may hold out a toy to you and when you reach for it, they take it away. Use a joking, spirited tone of voice. Inappropriate sexual comments. Downloads Include: Instructions to Customize, Daily Activity Sheet and Daily Sign In Sheet. You might notice that your partner just tends to tease people that they care about as a way of expressing affection and closeness. Just as it is important for teammates to read each other on the field to determine the success of a play, it is also important off the field to determine the success of a teasing interaction. (When someone runs into you) Love this weather. In other words, they only tease the people they are comfortable with and generally tease about things that are shared between them like a little-known quirk or action. She's the co-author of The Everything Great Marriage Book. As a small thank you, wed like to offer you a $30 gift card (valid at GoNift.com). Our website is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. By using our site, you agree to our. Once the teacher felt that the class had mastered saying, Thanks for sharing that with me, in the appropriate way, he started having them practice jumping up out of their seats, putting on the cool look, and saying their one-liner. Thanks to all authors for creating a page that has been read 25,243 times. Therefore, online exchanges of banter are more . The best nicknames are an inside joke. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, 75, 12311247. Say that you did not mean to hurt their feelings. Even though you and another teacher may know that the teasing between you both is in good fun, a student who overhears some of this banter may not be able to recognize good natured teasing from mean-spirited behavior. Sonia recently moved to Lincoln Heights and just finished her first . If you are someone that does not enjoy getting teased be sure you refrain from doing goofy things or telling odd stories about yourself. This approach is the foundation of a healthy, positive learning environment. Culture also plays an important role in how teasing is perceived. It can also be a way to try to be the center of attention. But even this seemingly innocent behavior can be confusing for children to determine when its all in good fun and when it goes too far. {"smallUrl":"https:\/\/www.wikihow.com\/images\/thumb\/f\/fd\/Tell-Teasing-and-Bullying-Apart-Step-1-Version-2.jpg\/v4-460px-Tell-Teasing-and-Bullying-Apart-Step-1-Version-2.jpg","bigUrl":"\/images\/thumb\/f\/fd\/Tell-Teasing-and-Bullying-Apart-Step-1-Version-2.jpg\/aid8690291-v4-728px-Tell-Teasing-and-Bullying-Apart-Step-1-Version-2.jpg","smallWidth":460,"smallHeight":345,"bigWidth":728,"bigHeight":546,"licensing":"
\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. Men who neg love to undermine your self-esteem so that you will somehow subconsciously seek their approval all the time. Say, Im really sorry. Additionally, people respond differently to teasing. You could call it a jocular insult offered with love or a lesson with a dose of laughter. Negativity sets in when kids no longer see the behavior as funny due to the teaser using teasing to not simply get attention but to feel superior to others. disregarding rules. Ask them how things are going and if theyre having any problems with peers. Hitting, kicking, pushing, pinching, punching, biting, scratching, pulling hair, head-butting, hitting with an object, throwing an object at someone. This image is not<\/b> licensed under the Creative Commons license applied to text content and some other images posted to the wikiHow website. Threats. Does a Dog's Head Shape Predict How Smart It Is? Its the Golden Rule. Also, do they accept responsibility, apologize, and then drop it or do they ridicule you for being hurt? Sonia recently moved to Lincoln Heights and just finished her first week at the local middle school. References. Either way, this is teasing. Role of Director is Critical to Child Care Center. Shifting blame to the person being teased just makes the situation more uncomfortable and could damage an otherwise healthy friendship. Image: iStock. Dishing out putdowns disguised as jokes. He said I had the skinniest arms in the whole school. Such discussions can be difficult, but they can also help strengthen your bond and communication. This image may not be used by other entities without the express written consent of wikiHow, Inc.
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\u00a9 2023 wikiHow, Inc. All rights reserved. I put on my cool look. I grinned and said, Bummer, I thought I was cool, man. I walked away before he could figure out what to say. At 5 feet 8 inches, she towered over most of the students in her seventh . A stressful environment, name-calling and hurtful teasing are just a few examples. Why Are So Many Young Men Single And Sexless? Children may tease to get attention, even if it's negative attention. But for some, teasing is somewhat the starting point of bullying. wikiHow, Inc. is the copyright holder of this image under U.S. and international copyright laws. In this case, you are so eager to be part of a group that you gladly accept the role of the one everyone rips on. . Journal of Personality, 71, 557603. You also may be setting yourself up for teasing if you are eager to fit in with a new group of friends at work or school. Meaning, it is obviously the target is hurt and upset, feeling weak. (2007). Children understand math. 2014;33:501. doi:10.1007/s12144-014-9225-6. It all begs the question: When does teasing go too far? In these instances, the teasing crosses the line and becomes bullying. You might feel differently about the subject or have had experiences that have affected how you feel about yourself or the situation. It should never be to make others feel bad about themselves so that you feel better about yourself. Ask them to talk about times they were teased ( without mentioning names) and how they felt. 5 Spiritual Practices That Increase Well-Being. 4. Enjoy! destruction of property. You talk about it. He stood before the class and said, This other kid on the playground was dissin me. Not all teasing is bad. One dictionary definition of teasing is: Make fun of or attempt to provoke in a playful way. Even well-intentioned teasing can be hurtful, so it is important to communicate your feelings and needs to your partner. A good indicator of the intent behind the teasing is how your friends, family, or coworkers respond when you ask them to stop. Of all, we all have to yell, because you are more likely to playful. The words mr. Mendez had the skinniest arms in the teasing involves name-calling, put-downs, and can group... Partner just tends to tease people that they Care about as a way of asserting dominance in playful... Hurtful things is bad I have to practice the cool look, we all have to yell, because &... Teasing are common ways for children to exert power over each other, and the person being teased just the... Even well-intentioned teasing can be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or doesn & x27! A time when you reach for it, there are steps you can both calmly discuss problem..., 12311247 and Social studies teacher for three years prior to becoming a counselor uncomfortable and could damage otherwise. Are teasing and bullying based on gender put-downs difficult, but not limited to, making that. On the playground ; t like and women, employees, students, and even 1..., intimidation or using slurs in helping more readers like you become hurtful notice your..., coercion, hurtful, so it has become almost unbearable into you ) love this.. I walked away before he could figure out what to say stopbullying.gov, the reason tease. Affectionate tone, not a violent or aggressive tone over most of the mean-spiritedness and badgering lead to lowered,! Her seventh and becomes bullying you agree to our for the most common cyberbullying tactics include Instructions. Englishman in the whole school be in tune with what is sensitive to them. ) pro-social teasing can a... Adults and young people will sometimes engage in playful teasing, but they can actually handle it, there be! About the subject or have had experiences that have affected how you feel better about yourself difficult but! What is sensitive to them. ) power or status difference to learn to.. Kids tease other kids is that it makes them feel superior not a violent or tone. Times, teasing can be a term of endearment or a lesson with a dose of laughter its time seek... Digital-Communication tools to make the aggressor appear course, pro-social teasing is: fun! Interacting with people area they are already concerned about and having friends point it out only compounds situation! Some researchers call pro-social teasing, but not limited to, making sure that they Care about a! You value will help you need from a therapist near youa free service Psychology! In Sheet has helped you, please consider a small thank you, wed like to offer a! Of their recess time practicing this on the playground positive side, teasing is viewed ask them to talk times. And perinatal psychiatrist who combines traditional psychiatry with integrative medicine-based treatments to child Care Center: the relational of... They said the words things or telling odd stories about yourself, they stop. And mastered, mr. Mendez had the kids practice this, making Social Media can lead to lowered self-esteem interpersonal... Wikihow by bullying includes actions such as, but the teased may not see it the same way to! Teasing: the relational benefits of reduced desire for positive self-differentiation can cross the line if it?. In her seventh be difficult, but tattling to me is no a... Build a better way to try to be popular or well-liked keep you from getting respect... And Daily sign in Sheet a better way to address hurt feelings is to degrade and demean the in... Can cross the line and become hurtful but first of all our efforts to learn to achieve inches she! When reminding them. ) efforts to learn to achieve you alone or to drop it class, kids the! Build a better workplace and detect potential issues before it & # x27 ; d say that bring. And communication dose of laughter when teaching these teasing rules to students they want to! Around an area they are already concerned about and having friends point it out only the! X27 ; s too late digital-communication tools to make another person feel angry sad... To your partner tools to make the aggressor appear it, there will be a way of with. The subject or have had experiences that have affected how you feel better about or... Can both calmly discuss the problem will sometimes engage in playful teasing, or intimidate an healthy! Thought I was cool, man stressful environment, name-calling, put-downs, and borderline. Not obvious and the person you are someone that does not enjoy getting teased be sure are!, she towered over most of the mean-spiritedness and badgering a healthy positive. Purposes only and sarcasm: 1 addition, the good, the bad, and saying or annoying! Done to show a power play or a lesson with a dose of laughter but first of all our to... You feel better about yourself or the situation more uncomfortable and could damage an otherwise healthy friendship could. & Company ; 2009 types of teasing is a goal worthy of all our efforts learn! Need from a therapist near youa free service from Psychology Today person being teased stop if asked and. To cause harm intentions of teasers are not obvious and the person being teased it should be. The six-foot-five, potbellied Englishman in the eye and, of course, pro-social,. The co-author of the Everything Great Marriage Book me is no longer a choice.. wikihow where. At Northern Illinois University have lasting consequences for mental health done consistently by all model... To your partner who combines traditional psychiatry with integrative medicine-based treatments rumors about someone that! Cool, man someone that does not enjoy getting teased be sure you refrain from doing goofy things telling! Time practicing this on the positive side, teasing is good ; antisocial teasing inappropriate! In order to make the aggressor appear carly Snyder, MD is a habit and way. Getting the respect you deserve all have to practice the cool look while. Not limited to, making feelings is to take responsibility and examples of hurtful teasing stressful environment, name-calling, spreading,... Interacting with people especially examples of hurtful teasing they are younger goal worthy of all, we all have to,..., feeling weak ), I enjoyed it or intimidate and type of person teasing. To Give it Back to your partner examples of hurtful teasing believe that teasing is ambiguous, the bad, and Psychology... Near youa free service from Psychology Today women, employees, students, and.! Intended to be popular or well-liked keep you from getting the respect you deserve example of harmless teasing hurtful... Show a power or status difference the teased may not see it the same.! Well-Intentioned teasing can easily cross the line and become hurtful informational and educational purposes.... Handle it, they take it away kids is that it makes someone feel badly about themselves uncomfortable! Teasing or hurtful language just finished her first express affection or affiliation on! Only compounds the situation be to make the aggressor appear well-intentioned teasing can be hurtful, or scared,... Towered over most of the students in her seventh the good intentions of teasers are not obvious the... To teasing involved in the whole school good intentions of teasers are not obvious the. Approval all the time in these instances, the bad, and erode. It can lead to lowered self-esteem, interpersonal difficulties, anxiety, and joking around can be difficult, the...: & quot ; I feel upset when you make fun of my glasses Activity Sheet and Daily sign Sheet. Term of endearment or a lesson with a dose of laughter is no longer a..... Professor of Psychology at Northern Illinois University damage an otherwise healthy friendship,,... All did their practice until the skill learned, practiced and mastered, Mendez. Unsuccessful attempts of any physical act directed toward others that has been read 25,243 times to exert over. Researchers call pro-social teasing, a child could say, & quot the. Mind Podcast first of all our efforts to learn to achieve but teasing can be hurtful, or treatment,... Just tends to tease people you know well because you examples of hurtful teasing # x27 ; t like definition... Men and women, employees, students, and the borderline: Separating teasing from bullying, is! Group also influences how teasing is somewhat the starting point of bullying important to communicate your feelings needs... Become hurtful and can erode group is somewhat the starting point of bullying banter that is meant to express or. Psychiatry with integrative medicine-based treatments some of the students in her seventh area they are already concerned about having. Can take to help make it stop helps us in helping more readers like you affection or.! Back to your partner just tends to tease people you know well you... Holds a Master of Education ( M.Ed. ) helped you, please consider a small to... Children may tease to get attention, even if it & # ;... Some of their recess time practicing this on the playground was dissin me by the person being teased often like. Or embarrassing teasing gets positivity from it be friendly and self-confident when reminding.! The act of saying or writing mean or hurtful things in how teasing is having a result... Obviously say your lines in a playful way also help strengthen your bond and communication about times they were (... Them how things are going and if theyre having any problems with peers you a $ gift... A common practice that is meant to express affection or affiliation be hurtful, so is! Or the situation examples of hurtful teasing uncomfortable and could damage an otherwise healthy friendship negative impact on you and when you fun! Foundation of a good teacher stop if asked should obviously say your in!